


Experimental Chemistry

by Hours_Gone_By



Series: AU Yeah AUgust 2019 [11]
Category: The Transformers (Cartoon Generation One), Transformers Generation One, Transformers – All Media Types
Genre: Alcohol, Alternate Universe, Bars and Pubs, Chemistry, Community: trope_bingo, Developing Friendship, Developing Relationship, Energon, Energon Science Anyway, Engineers, Food Science, Holding Hands, Kissing, Lab Accidents, Love Triangle, M/M, Microbrew, Multi, Polyamory, Trope Bingo Round 13, Trope Bingo Round Thirteen, au yeah august, bar/pub, bartending, brewery, brewing, discussion of polyamory, mixology, scientists - Freeform, talking about things like adults
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-13
Updated: 2019-10-13
Packaged: 2020-12-14 13:53:13
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,147
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21016835
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Hours_Gone_By/pseuds/Hours_Gone_By
Summary: Jazz is the proud owner of a new bar that's become a bit of a hangout for researchers from a nearby company. After his friend Wheeljack brings a coworker named Perceptor in for a drink as thanks for helping clean up an accident, Perceptor becomes curious about mixology and chemistry occurs.Also, new drinks.





	Experimental Chemistry

**Author's Note:**

> AU Yeah AUgust Day 17 – Bartender.
> 
> Used for [Trope Bingo](https://www.trope-bingo.dreamwidth.org) [Round 13](https://archiveofourown.org/collections/TropeBingo_RoundThirteen/profile) (Prompt: Love Triangle.)

Jazz polished the top of the bar to a mirror shine and smiled down at his own reflection. He'd been working at a smaller, slightly run-down pub that catered mostly to students for stellar-cycles before opening his own place. It wasn't in an area that'd ever become a nightlife hotspot, but it was _his_. Besides, once he started getting some better-known bands in things would pick up. Until then, he was making enough to get by, even doing better than he'd expected since he'd opened the dining room to the lunch crowd. They were mostly business mecha and scientists and engineers from that R&D place down the street, but they paid, and they tipped, and that was good enough for Jazz.

Mostly he saw the R&D-ers mid-day, with a few coming in around evening-time for drinks after work or what have you. They seemed to prefer the quieter nights early in the week, which was fine by Jazz because those were the nights that needed a revenue boost.

Tonight one of the more garrulous regulars, who gave his designation as Wheeljack, walked in and headed straight for the bar, towing a red-and-blue mech with a scope on his shoulder. Jazz recognized the look of someone dragging their shy friend out for the evening. Probably not selling anything too hard to this mech, then.

"Hey, Wheeljack," Jazz said, pleased to see the mech. Wheeljack was a bit on the odd side, but hey! Jazz liked that in his friends. "Who's this with you?"

"Hey, Jazz. This is Perceptor, he works in the chem department just down the hall from me. He helped me out in the lab today, so I brought him out for a drink as thanks." Wheeljack thumped Perceptor on the back, and the mech almost stumbled.

"Ah, yes, well," Perceptor stammered. "I was passing by with the appropriate materials, and it seemed only prudent to assist."

"Uh-huh." Jazz hadn't overheard Wheeljack and his friends talking and not picked up a few things. "What was on fire?"

Wheeljack looked sheepish. "It wasn't really a fire, it was an acidic reaction creating a corrosive gas – but Perceptor here happened to have a neutralizer on hand, so it's fine. Once the floor is repaired, you'll never know anything happened."

Jazz laughed and shook his head. "Well, I don't got anything corrosive – bad for business - but I do have some stuff that'll light a fire in you. Whaddya say, mech?"

"Sounds great! One for me and one for Perceptor here, okay?"

"Oh, I generally prefer something milder…"

"I can mix it up with something," Jazz offered. "You'll still get the spice but less of the burn, so to speak."

Perceptor accepted the mixed drink while Wheeljack took his neat, as always, and paid for both of them. Jazz gave them the drinks, chatted for a klik, or so more, then had to break away to serve other customers. Wheeljack and Perceptor ended up moving to a table and getting served by floor staff and Jazz didn't think anything about it. He didn't expect to see Perceptor again any time soon, either.

To his surprise, Perceptor walked in again a few evenings later, on his own. Huh. Jazz hadn't thought the mech'd be the type to go out for drinks on the regular, but he'd been wrong before.

"Hey, Perceptor," Jazz greeted him. "What's happening, mech? What can I get for you?"

"Truthfully, Jazz, I did not come here for libation," Perceptor said. "I observed you preparing drinks last night and became curious as to whether you were familiar with any of the chemical reactions involved in their composition."

"Do I know what happens to make them taste the way they do, you mean?" Jazz asked. "Not really. I mean, I know that's a whole subset of fuel science, but I was never into the 'how's and 'why's, just the end result."

"But there must be some methodology behind your choices," Perceptor said thoughtfully. "Do you experiment to create new blends?"

"Well, sometimes, yeah," Jazz said. "But right now, I'm mostly focusing on traditional favourites, not playing around with mixology too much. Once I get a steadier client base, I'll try getting fancier. I mean, I'm not Maccadam or anything."

"No," Perceptor said thoughtfully. "I suppose not. I am curious as to how the principles of chemistry may be applied to the creation of, er, 'cocktails.'"

Jazz swore he could hear the quotation marks in the mech's voice. "Well, if you wanna come back here and wash up, I can give you a quick run-through of the basics?"

"That would be most enlightening Jazz, thank you."

So Perceptor spent the better part of the evening behind the bar. Jazz gave him a quick lesson on how to make some classic drinks. Perceptor got them down fast, and he did them well. By the end of the night, Jazz would have sworn the mech'd been making Bloody Z's and Mood Whiplashes for stellar-cycles.

"Get what you were looking for, Perceptor?" Jazz asked after closing as they were cleaning up. Jazz hadn't expected Perceptor to do that – he wasn't an employee, after all – but he wasn't going to reject the help either.

"Yes," Perceptor said thoughtfully. "That was most intriguing. I have some ideas that I shall have to think about. Would you be open to experimentation?"

"With the drinks, you mean?"

Perceptor coughed a little, looking away. "Yes, well…yes."

Jazz grinned. "Cool. So, probably a bit late to start tonight, but you wanna come by in a couple cycles after you've thought things out? I'll set some space aside, and we'll see what we can come up with."

"That would be most agreeable, Jazz, thank you."

Perceptor came by a couple of cycles later, as Jazz had suggested, bringing with him a stack of additives and a tablet filled with potential recipes. Jazz scrolled through them when Perceptor handed over the tablet and whistled in surprise.

"You've got a bit of everything here, don't you, mech? The mixed drinks we can do but the other stuff – I'd need a brewing setup for that."

"Yes, I had thought you might. I believe some of my chemistry equipment may be sufficient to create small amounts of specialized high-grade, but I wanted your opinion before undergoing the time involved in doing so. And the expense, of course, should extra hardware and supplies be needed."

Jazz nodded. "Yeah, makes sense. I'll take a deeper look over them after we close when I won't get interrupted, but we can get started on the drinks we can make with the stuff I've got tonight."

Perceptor looked pleased. "Thank you, Jazz. That is most appreciated."

Jazz had set up a little bar in one of the back rooms, so they could experiment without interruption. Perceptor might not be a professional bartender, but it was pretty obvious he was into what he was doing. FIM chips engaged, they could even sample their experiments without getting overcharged. Jaz wasn't a scientist, but he was pretty sure experimenting on anything while you were drunk was more likely to end in something unusable than otherwise.

Still, Jazz was looking forward to trying a few of these with his FIM chip off. Like the shimmery blue one rimmed with mercury and silver that was all sweet and tart at the same time. He just knew he'd get a nice buzz going off that one. It was already going on the menu as it was. Same with the translucent gold one with the bubbles and the one that looked like a sunset.

"Everything's looking good," Jazz said. "Real good."

"Indeed. I am most pleased with tonight's outcome." Perceptor did look pleased; Jazz decided it was a good look for him. "I am looking forward to hearing your opinions on my brewing suggestions."

"Within the next cycle or two," Jazz promised. "Meanwhile, wanna take these recipes out to the bar and see what my customers think?"

"Certainly."

So mid-way through the evening was a bit of a weird time to put new specials up on the board. Jazz did it anyway, and it took a couple minutes for them to get noticed and tried, but once they did, everything took off. Jazz didn't quite have to make an emergency run for booze, but it was a pretty close thing.

"Well, that was certainly a smashing success!" Perceptor said as Jazz locked the doors after the last patron. "Most satisfactory."

"You said it, mech." Jazz patted him on the shoulder. "Gonna have to give you a stake in the biz if this keeps up."

"What? Oh, no," Perceptor said quickly. "I've no need for a stake, simply observing the success of my experiments is sufficient."

"Gotta do something for you," Jazz said reasonably, starting to bus the nearest table. Sure, he had staff for that, but he still liked to help out. "They're your ideas, and most of 'em are your work. Percent of the take?"

"I suppose monetary compensation would be appropriate if you insist."

"I insist. I'll work something out, you tell me if it's fair. Deal?"

"I – yes. Er, deal."

Perceptor hung out for a while after cleanup and close were finished, just chatting. He tended to get distracted and ramble a bit, but Jazz liked listening to it. He had a bit of a thing for voices and Perceptor had a pretty fragging nice one. It was late by the time Perceptor left and later still before Jazz got himself to bed because he did look over Perceptor's brewing ideas. He thought they were good to go. Jazz wasn't a brewer, but he knew a couple mechs who were, and he'd picked up a few things. Besides, it looked like Perceptor had done research on his own, not just slapped a bunch of things together he thought might work. Perceptor was very attentive. Jazz liked it. He wondered just what else Perceptor might apply that level of attention to.

Jazz did a little bit of research on brewing methods just to make extra sure everything was plausible, and then gave Perceptor the all-clear on the new round of experiments. It took a few cycles for Perceptor to get some equipment together and set up. Then, they had to run the experiments at Perceptor's home laboratory, which meant they had to find time together outside their nearly opposite work hours.

Well, Jazz _was_ his own boss. There were benefits to that.

Mixing and processing the energon took just a few hours, and after that, they had to leave it to age. The glowing cubes of high-grade sat in a purpose-bought cupboard at Perceptor's for just over a deca-cycle before they were ready for taste-testing. Jazz didn't see Perceptor every day while they were waiting, but he saw him pretty frequently. Jazz liked the mech's voice and liked seeing him wax enthusiastic about his latest project, even if he did get pretty heavy into the fifty-shanix words. Jazz started to think maybe he should go for something a little more with Perceptor, see if the mech wanted to go out on a proper date. All a mech could do was ask and see what happened, right?

"Everything going pretty well with the brew, Perce?" Jazz asked one night when Perceptor came in. "Gotta be getting close to time, huh?"

"Yes, based on the colour and readouts, it should indeed be ready quite soon."

"Cool." Jazz meant it, too. He really was looking forward to trying out the results of their project. The mixed drinks they'd come up with together were big hits, and Jazz had made them permanent offerings on the menu.

"Yes, indeed." Perceptor looked pleased and ordered his usual, a light spritzer that had barely any alcohol content.

"So, if they work out, you wanna celebrate?" Jazz asked. "I'd love to take you out for a drink, not just serve you one."

"Oh. A date?" Jazz nodded, and Perceptor looked flustered. "Oh. I see. Well, I am flattered, Jazz – most flattered – but I must decline. I'm seeing someone."

Oh?

"Yeah? Good for you."

"I hope you're not too badly disappointed."

"Well, would've liked to take you out," Jazz admitted. "But I get it. So is it anyone I know?"

"Yes, as a matter of fact," Perceptor said, and looked thoughtful. "Truly, one could say our current enterprise is thanks to him, albeit indirectly."

Ah. "So, you and Wheeljack….?"

"Well, yes, as a matter of fact." Perceptor looked just past, instead of at, Jazz. "After I assisted him with the accident in his lab, we fell to speaking with each other often in addition to seeing each other socially. An attraction developed and from there, well. Yes. Wheeljack and I."

"Been wondering why Wheeljack can't stop grinning for the past couple cycles," Jazz said with a smile. He meant it, too. Sure, he would've liked something to happen with him and Perce, but if it wasn't to be, then it wasn't to be. "Congratulations, then!"

"Thank you, Jazz. I would certainly be amenable to sharing a friendly drink with you, however, despite unfortunately not being able to provide, er, more."

Unfortunately, huh? What could've been, Jazz supposed. "Sure, that's cool. Can bring 'Jack along if you want, can be a night out with friends instead of a date."

"I shall enquire," Perceptor promised, and then Jazz got called away, so that was that for the evening.

* * *

Wheeljack came in a couple of cycles later, and now that Jazz knew what to look for, the mech did have that 'new relationship glow' to him. Made Jazz feel a little bad for hitting on his friend's love interest, even if there was no way he could have known.

"Hey, 'Jack," Jazz said, a little more neutrally than usual, not sure if Perceptor had mentioned Jazz's invite or not and how Wheeljack would feel about it.

"Perceptor told me you asked him out, no, I'm not upset," Wheeljack said, leaning on the bar. "I did come to talk to you about it, though, 'cause Perceptor really would've said 'yes' if he and I weren't seeing each other."

Okay, that made Jazz feel better. He'd been worried he'd been misinterpreting things with Perceptor. Still made him think 'what if?' though.

"It's cool, 'Jack," Jazz said quickly. "You're together, I'll back off."

Wheeljack shook his head. "No, that's not what I came here to say. Jazz: if you're both into each other and you want to see where it goes, _it's fine_. I'm not jealous, and I'm perfectly okay with Perceptor seeing you as well. He and I already talked about it – would've brought him in to talk to you as well, but he can be a bit shy sometimes."

Yeah, Jazz had gotten that impression: he thought it was endearing.

"Well, okay, yeah, if you don't mind Percy and me seeing each other, I'd sure go for it. Once we all talk to each other, though."

"Yeah, of course." Jazz polished the top of the bar. "Set the boundaries and all that, I get it."

"Yup," Wheeljack said cheerfully. "Not the most fun part, but it's gotta be done."

"I've never done this before, seen someone who's seeing someone else," Jazz said honestly. "So I'm gonna have lots of questions. Might stumble a few times."

"We'll walk you through it," Wheeljack said confidently. "Just takes patience for everyone sometimes. You'll be fine, Jazz. We all will."

* * *

Wheeljack and Perceptor had both been patient when they'd all sat down and talked and soon Jazz hadn't felt even a bit nervous. The experimental high-grade had turned out _perfectly,_ and Jazz had a taste-testing set up at his bar in a couple of cycles. Now, Jazz and Perceptor were out for that drink, their first official date, with Wheeljack's blessing.

"How do you feel about all of this?" Perceptor asked mid-way through the night.

"Still kinda got Wheeljack in the back of my head," Jazz said honestly. "I mean, I knew about polyamory just never – you know? It's new. I'm adjusting. Doesn't mean I don't wanna."

"We will be happy to hold further discussions whenever you wish," Perceptor promised.

Jazz lived above the bar, at last for now, and while he definitely had no objection to 'facing on the first date he was still in an odd headspace about the whole 'my court-mate has a court-mate' thing. He settled for just a kiss when Perceptor walked him home.

A damn good kiss, though. Turned out that laboratory-chemistry and brewing-chemistry weren't the only kinds Perceptor was good at.

A second date was definitely on the table, but it got a bit delayed by the next step in Jazz and Perceptor's brewing experiment: getting feedback from the public.

Perceptor knew chemistry, Wheeljack knew mechanical engineering, but Jazz knew mecha and marketing. He'd been able to drum up more than enough interest to make the experiment worthwhile, feedback-wise, if maybe not cost-wise, or at least not cost-wise yet. If the new brews went over as well as the new drinks had, though, Jazz was pretty sure it'd wind up that way.

Wheeljack came to the tasting event, and he was totally cool with the three of them hanging out, helm fins not so much as flickering when Perceptor kissed Jazz quickly in front of him. Perceptor kissed 'Jack, too, and that – well, that was pretty hot.

"Still okay with this?" Wheeljack asked Jazz, just before they opened the doors to their test subjects – er, _select patrons_.

"Yeah," Jazz said, patting Wheeljack on the arm. "Yeah, I'm still good. Everything's going really well."

"Good."

Everything went really well for the rest of the night, too. They didn't entirely run out of their new booze before the end, but it was a near thing. Mecha tasted, and then mecha ordered, and Jazz started to wish he'd put on a backup server. Sure, he had a spare drone, but that wasn't quite the touch he wanted to give for this. Still, better than making customers wait.

At least he knew his investment was sound.

At the end of the night, once everything was locked and cleaned up, Jazz dropped down on one of the benches against the wall. Wheeljack dropped down on one side of him, and Perceptor sat on the other. Jazz grabbed his hand and squeezed it and then, after a nano-klik's thought, did the same for Wheeljack.

"Good night?" Jazz asked rhetorically.

"Yup, sure was!"

"Indeed, most satisfactory."

"Yeah," Jazz agreed. "Real promising." He kissed Perceptor again then, after a moment's thought, turned to his other side and offered one to Wheeljack as well. Wheeljack exchanged a glance with Perceptor, who nodded, and accepted. "Guess from here we just keep working at it and see what happens."

"Yes," Perceptor said contentedly, and Wheeljack made a noise of agreement. "We do."

**Author's Note:**

> Yeah, I got nothing more for this, so if anyone wants to pick it up and play, go right ahead. 😊  
\---  
[Bloody Z](https://tfwiki.net/wiki/Bloody_Z)'s and [Mood Whiplashes](https://tfwiki.net/wiki/Mood_Whiplash) are both canon. TFWiki not only has a category for [drink](https://tfwiki.net/wiki/Category:Drink) but also one for [intoxicants](https://tfwiki.net/wiki/Category:Intoxicants). I love Transformers.


End file.
